What the heck with my hip!
I woke up this morning feeling a little off. Effects of the full moon last night perhaps. So I made time to sit down and meditate to change my head space. Various thoughts race through my mind as I start to connect with my breathing and start to turn my focus within. I open up my thymus point and I start to raise my vibration by calling on 528. Went through the sequence to relax the front and then the back. Started to blank my mind and activate the pathways between heart and brain communication etc….
What to focus on for today’s meditation? When in doubt always start with my body. I quickly scanned my body and my left hip caught my attention. Let’s focus on what thought form has lodged itself there. As I send love to it and asked to find out what’s going on there I was flabbagasted by a lot of emotions! I got a data-dump of all my unprocessed emotions between me and my children. I missed them since they don’t live with me any more. I felt guilt and shame about what I could have done better. I felt deeply inadequate that I was too naive and inexperience as a mother and oh so unconscious when they were young. I felt responsible for their struggles now. I felt disappointment that our relationship is not better. I seemed to have openned a can of worms and there is so much unprocessed emotions surrounding that. No wonder my left hip has been acting up. There’s also some stuff from my relationship with my mother left there too but thankfully I’ve done a lot of release work on that already so it’s not as heavilty loaded. Then there’s also related to the role of woman in society as well. Why do we get stuck with giving birth? My body is just not the same after I had kids. The nine months of gestation is just the tip of the iceberg. It’s all the responsibilities and burden and sacrifices that were made etc…
It was nonsensical how much emotions can be trapped in no more then about 4 square inches of my body!!! Unbelievable how much self-loathing and inadequacy can be packed in such a small space. Then I started to shift into releasing these emotions. These are not just my own unacknowledged emotions, they are layers and layers of mass programming. So I keep sending love to whatever thought forms that keep coming up. They are just thoughts and emotions. Thankyou for the experience and keep greeting these thought forms with unconditional love. I don’t know when my body will be done with these thought forms, but I do know that my hip is feeling better the more I send it love. I also called on solar light from the 5th dimension to illuminate this area. The solar light has an intelligence that can transform these thought forms. I stayed on this process of transformation until my left hip feels balanced and the pattern there does not need any more attention.
Next I want to connect with Gaia in the 5th Dimension. It’s been a week or so since I last had a deep meditation connecting with Gaia. I miss that connection. I don’t want to know anything or get anything from this, I just want to be with Gaia. So I went into my heart and invited her to join me. A feminine form showed up in my mind’s eye and I wanted more. I want a meeting of our hearts, our beings, I don’t want to deal with the duality of form. The form transformed into a brilliant light and we hung out for a while.